Author Archives: Noor Mastura

Stop Lying. It’s Not Aib.

“This is Aib. You shouldnt expose what he did.” In this case, he meaning the asatizah. Well, that’s the biggest lie they told us. And in this episode, I break down why Islam demands that we speak out and call out such acts, people and behaviour.

It’s Ok Now. You Are Safe.

The last two days has been heartbreakingly painful. The stories that has been coming in from girls and women about their experience with abuse, particularly with religious figures or workplace/school settings has been difficult to digest.

But with every story that gets sent to me, there is a silver lining.
For many of them, they are telling me this story for the first time. After carrying something so heavy for a long, long time – they are finally building that courage to click on my DMs and with trembling hands, and soft tears running down their faces, recounting their story and typing it out to me.

This I have realised, is the superpower of @beingbravelywoman.

For many of us, these stories are plastered with shame.
Shame which should have never fallen on us in the first place.
And shame can consume you.

Here is an analogy to illustrate how this works.
Think of shame as a demon. A demon that will whatever it takes to devour you completely. The only way to get rid of this demon, it to expose the demon to Light. And this Light is not the normal light we are familiar with. This Light is a process. A process which requires you to tell your story. Your story of what happened to you. Each time you tell someone about it by shining Light on what happened to you, the demon gets weaker and weaker. Eventually, there will come a day, where it is destroyed completely and can no longer have a hold on you.

Every woman who came forward to tell me their story for the first time, ends their DM with me with the same message.

“I feel so much lighter now.”
“I feel a little relief.”
“I actually feel so much better.”

And not everyone deserves to know your story. And not everyone will know how to carry your story. So choose wisely who you wish to tell. But tell someone. It doesnt have to be the whole story if you are not ready yet. It does not have to be every single detail. But whatever you can, tell.

This is why therapy is always encouraged. Because you TELL someone your story in therapy. It’s something you keep talking about. You keep exposing the demon of Shame.

So look around your circle, identify those you trust and expose shame.
And if you can’t find anyone, you have @beingbravelywoman.
I will be here.
I will be listening.
You will be safe.